Common sense goes up in smoke

Posted on Saturday, 04.04.09
Common sense goes up in smoke
By CARL HIAASEN
It's been a tough year for smokers, and now Florida lawmakers are considering a $1-a-pack tax on top of the new federal excise hike of 62 cents.

Supporters say the measure would raise $870 million to partially offset the $1.25 billion that it costs Florida taxpayers annually to subsidize extended healthcare for tobacco-related illnesses.

Just as significantly, a cigarette ''user fee'' would reduce the number of people smoking in Florida -- as it has in other states that passed similar taxes -- by making the habit too expensive.

That's what worries Ellyn Bogdanoff, the Fort Lauderdale Republican who chairs the Finance and Tax Committee in the House. She strongly opposes a cigarette tax because fewer smokers would be bad for business.

The woman is dead serious, folks.

In particular, Bogdanoff worries about the impact that a cigarette tax would have on convenience stores -- not exactly the bedrock of our economy, but these are the establishments where most young smokers buy their Marlboros and Camels.

''Twenty-two percent of all sales in convenience stores are cigarettes,'' Bogdanoff said. ``We need to look at everything. If they don't go in to buy cigarettes, they don't buy the Coke. They don't buy the chips.''

And if they don't buy the chips, then they don't buy the beef jerky! God help us!

The citizens of Broward County should feel proud to have a representative who bravely stands up for capitalism at all costs and says to hell with the public's health.

True, cigarettes cause lung cancer, throat cancer, mouth cancer, emphysema, heart disease and strokes. And sure, they're highly addictive.

But for all you smokers who might be thinking about quitting, don't be so darn selfish. Listen to Rep. Bogdanoff when she says that Florida's convenience stores really, really need your money.

Her pitch calls to mind a popular Christopher Buckley novel called Thank You for Smoking, which many readers enjoyed as blistering political satire. Bogdanoff obviously absorbed the book as a lesson plan.

There's much evidence that higher cigarette taxes discourage people from starting to smoke, and also cause hard-core smokers to stop cold turkey.

In New York City, where a pack of butts now costs between $9 and $10, health officials say there are 300,000 fewer adult smokers today than there were in 2002. Cigarette use among public high-school students dropped 52 percent during roughly the same period.

That might be good for the lungs and life spans of those ex-smokers, but it's bad for the retail outlets where they once bought their ciggies. In this troubled economy, we need every tobacco addict to stay addicted.

The Petroleum Marketers Association, which represents convenience stores during legislative sessions, won't go as far as Bogdanoff to publicly fret about a potential decline in cigarette sales. The lobby group says it opposes the $1-a-pack tax because smokers will get around the high price by purchasing cheaper cigarettes in other states, or from Internet sites run by Indian tribes, which are not subject to the tax.

On Thursday I went to a convenience store on A1A, and it was jammed. I didn't see a single customer walk out with cigarettes -- apparently they'd already hooked up with their Seminole connections.

Democrats in the Legislature have tried before to raise the cigarette tax, only to be thwarted by the powerful tobacco lobby. But now, in a shocking shift of allegiances, some top GOP lawmakers say the time has come.

Last week, a Senate committee unanimously voted in favor of hiking the state tax from 34 cents to $1.34 per pack, and $1 per ounce on cigars and smokeless tobacco products.

Bogdanoff's counterpart on the Senate Finance and Tax Committee, Republican Thad Altman of Melbourne, says the revenue is necessary to help bring down the high cost of funding Medicaid, which has been bloated with tobacco-related hospital care.

Altman contends that nonsmokers have borne an unfair share of the price for treating smokers who become chronically ill.

OK, so $870 million is a mountain of dough at a time when the state budget is in desperate straits. And, yes, fewer Floridians would take up the lethal habit if the price of Newports jumped by a buck, which means lives would be saved and public hospital beds could go to other patients.

But what would happen to your local 7-Eleven if cigarette sales dropped three or four percent? How could it possibly stay afloat by selling overpriced milk and beer and Pringles and Slurpees? The corner convenience store is an American institution, and we can all cough easier because of public servants such as Bogdanoff, who stand ready to fight for its profit margins. She's in a good position to kill the proposed cigarette tax, and it seems likely she will.

In the meantime, be a patriotic consumer. If you don't smoke, give it a try. If you do smoke, smoke more.

And don't forget to load up on the chips and Coke.